This game may have the Mario brand, but it’s also a very comprehensive typing tutor. It only had one fault I could find, it wouldn’t let me skip ahead to more advanced levels if I felt I was advanced enough to start further ahead. I had to go through each of the easy levels to see what was happening up ahead.

The first step is to create yourself a profile. Give yourself a name and choose if you want to play as Mario, Luigi or Princess Peach. Then you’re off starting your lessons.

There are five lessons, each contains different sets, such as numbers, letters, top keys, bottom keys, symbols and the entire keyboard. Each lesson is themed, the first being standard Mario head-butting blocks, plus under the sea, in the castle and typing a letter (of gobbledy-gook).

I’m not a huge Mario fan, but I did enjoy this typing tutor. It was addictive and it worked damnit! It’s a really good typing tutor. If you want to refine your skills so you can get that super-secretary job, or you want to be able to say more on IRC in a shorter span of time, then definitely have a turn with this. It’s abandonware, so it’s free. And one of the best free ones out there I’m sure.

Oh wow, I was bumming around per usual and stumbled across this game. Floppy Frenzy is made by Windmill Software, who bought us such treasures as Digger.

Now this game takes me way back! I remember thinking this was the corniest and geekiest idea for a game ever. The developer probably was sitting at his desk going ‘uh duhhh what should I uhhh.. game.. uhhh what about duhhh oh wow a disk.. oh uhhh ooo sticker says no dust.. ohhh a game.. uhh duhh cool’ . Indeed, a skeptic I was, but I was given this game way back when variety was slim, so I played it, and to my surprise, I thought it was rather funky (even though it was a rather strange concept).

This game is cool! You are a magical (well, not magical as you are square) 5.25″ floppy disk, and your job is to get through each maze-like level avoiding all the things you see on those stickers that come with disks (magnets and dust being apparent in this situation). If you touch magnets
or dust, you shall be ruined like any God-fearing disk would be!

I think the perfect sequels would have been the 3.5″ Floppy Frenzy, followed by the ever-popular CD Frenzy, Zipdisk Frenzy and Removable Hard-drive frenzy. But I guess the demand was low, a real shame really *sniff*.

The graphics were in lovely shades of red, green and gold ? liken to Digger, and other Windmill Software classics. I cannot comment on the sounds, if any you can expect the lovely sounds of your PC speaker.

Overall, Floppy Frenzy *cringe* is a nice simple yet totally fun game. It’s so cool how all these old games top the stakes in game-play, even after all these years. (Boy do I feel old). At 50kb, you can give it a shot.

It’s very hard to review a text only game over 20 years after it’s creation. With todays uber-mammy-jammy 3D graphics and superduper interactive digital surround sound doodahs (no, I have no clue what I’m on about) giving an opinion on such a game with an open mind is hard to say the least, so to begin I want to quote a short review from 1983:

The Zork trilogy, which chronicles happenings in a vast realm known as the Underground Empire, is the most famous of the all-text adventure games. Fantastic creatures, magic spells, and diabolical traps abound at every turn, and each room or area is described in long paragraphs of rich detail, helping the player visualize the setting.

In the first saga, titled The Great Underground Empire, the player begins outside a strange house that holds the hidden portal to the underground. Once below, the adventurer will rarely see daylight again until he finishes Zork III. Inside the house may be found a lamp and an ancient elfin sword. Whenever the computer tells you the sword is emitting a blue light, watch out: Dangerous creatures are around.

The intermediate level Zork II: The Wizard of Frozzbozz [sic] goes ever deeper into the underground realm, and the adventurer must now deal with dragons, unicorns, and a carousel of spinning death. Randomly appearing throughout the dungeon is the Wizard of Frozzbozz himself, who casts spells that all begin with the letter F (freeze, float, fluoresce, etc.). In the third game, The Dungeon Master, which is geared for the expert level, the player is faced with very complicated riddles to solve and finally must duel with the dungeon master of the title.

Though interconnected, each part of the trilogy is solvable separately. Zork I, the simplest, is a great game for first-time adventurers. The second and third installments become progressively more difficult.

Created by Marc Blank and Dave Lebling, the Zork trilogy has set a national standard for excellence in puzzle design. It will delight the game player with many months of adventures.

Right, read that have you?
Mind sufficiently opened?
Then I shall begin.

A little bit of the games story to begin with I think. In Zork you play an adventurer/treasure hunter in the ruins of a great empire (and underground empire no less), equip yourself, find treasure (and bring it back to your trophy case), kill monsters, solve puzzles – all standard stuff nowadays really (damnit! didn’t want to say anything like that).

Ok, what you need to keep in mind is that Zork was released in 1982 – 20 years ago as I write this review. At the time the text parser was considered something of a revolution, and it does still hold up well compared to more recent IF (interactive fiction) games. The parser can handle complex strings of commands and prepositions (get the apple and the sword of pointy death). Visually the game is nothing to look at, just a scrolling screen of text – HOWEVER, this can be considered a bonus as it allows us to concentrate on the task at hand and allow your mind to form the visuals itself (hey it’s just like reading a book! … you know… book… one of those leafy paper things you retarded child).

Gameplay is mostly comprised of “use the correct object in the correct place” type puzzles, with a few needing to be solved in a certain order or at the correct time. There are one or two annoying mazes in the game and because there is no automapping feature this spoiled things a little for me, the game also has a tendency to kill you almost randomly – another of my pet hates.

Guess I should wrap this up eh? (watch and see how trite I can make this)

Well what can I say; it’s a classic, the first game of its type. PLUS, it has been released as freeware so you really have no excuse for not owning the game.

Thumbs up, highly recommended and all that jazz.

Just download it, ok?